Recruitment Strategy

xEPIC PROTEGESx grills new prospects to ensure the right fit for the clan.

“After playing MW3 on xbox I got two random friend requests, both were in the same clan. They both joined the party I was in with my (male) friend and left without saying anything. Then I got these… lol. I said I didn’t have a husband and that apparently opened the door to the other messages. And ANOTHER friend request from one of his friends.”

xEPIC PROTEGESx - 1xEPIC PROTEGESx - 2xEPIC PROTEGESx - 3

  • Anonymous

    Gonglerz, that’s brand fuckin new to me

  • http://www.justplainsomething.com JustPlainSomething

    Rule number one: when you’re hitting on a girl, it’s not a good idea to suggest your penis is dead.

  • Anonymous

    limp dick is the new thing didn’t ya know?

  • http://www.justplainsomething.com JustPlainSomething

    Why does he think talking to her (non-existent) husband is going to convince her to have x-box sex with him? “Listen, your wife is being totally unreasonable. You know how women are, all emotional and playing hard to get when you talk about dead penises. You know what I’m talking about!”

  • http://www.popculturemulcher.tumblr.com popculturemulcher

    “My dick just died”

    “My dick just died”

    “MY DICK JUST DIED”

  • Anonymous

    Same here.  Though I presume it means “breasts”, I feel it could easily be a synonym for “testicles” instead.  ”Ow! Right in the gonglerz!”

  • Anonymous

    I really enjoyed this contribution.

  • http://www.popculturemulcher.tumblr.com popculturemulcher

    It keeps echoing in my brain. Like, I’m just living my life here, watching Downton Abbey or something and then suddenly, it comes screaming back, “My penis just died.”

    DAMMIT.

  • Austin Smith

    You know, you probably wouldn’t get these messages if you played better games.

  • http://twitter.com/1000DaysOfRain Conna Stevenson

    I dunno, I for one think it’d be great not to get these messages no matter the quality of the game.

  • Anonymous

    Careful about saying things like this.  Folks may reckon you’re a troll.

    I don’t think the type of game really matters.  I had a dude yell about how much he raped me after he beat me in Carcassonne.

  • http://www.facebook.com/Sephirajo Johanna Roberts

    No, he can’t bury it there, but he’s welcome to dig a grave for it in his backyard. 

  • http://twitter.com/juicepaket Jo V.

    my lungs just died because of the last one oh my god

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